Say the word “Toddler” and the dreaded T-words come to mind: Temper Tantrum, Terrible Two’s and Toilet Training. But although this is undeniably a challenging phase, it can also be one of the most rewarding periods if you take time to understand and support your precious little person. You might even learn a thing or two from them!
What’s all the Fuss About?
The dictionary defines the Terrible Two’s as: “a period in a child’s social development (typically around the age of two years) which is associated with very defiant or unruly behaviour”. A lot has been written about this time, and there are many scary first-hand accounts involving two-year-olds. Parents often try to outdo each other with horror stories about this dreaded phase, but it’s refreshing to know that you can make up your mind beforehand to embrace it and make the most of this time, because it too shall pass.
Understanding is Key
The main reason for the turbulence is that this is when your little one is transitioning from a baby to a child. They understand more than they can communicate, they know what they want, but don’t know how to get it, and they often feel frustrated. This is a scary time characterised by overwhelming emotions that can make them go from zero to hero and back again in a split second; from wailing at the top of their lungs the one minute, to laughing their heads off the next.
As Alicia Lieberman, author of The Emotional Life of the Toddler explains: “The most important emotional accomplishment of the toddler years is reconciling the urge to become competent and self-reliant with the longing for parental love and protection.” Whether your toddler is difficult, whining and cranky or hyperactive and wild, there is a very good chance that all she wants is to spend some quality time with you; her parent, so just bear with her.
Good News
Many parents feel totally unequipped to deal with this unpredictability, but your toddler needs to have the reassurance that you, as the parent, will stay calm and in control at all times, even if they lose it completely.
The three most common triggers for bad behaviour such as throwing temper tantrums, are fatigue, hunger and sensory overload. The good news is that all three can be prevented. By having a snack handy in your bag, making sure they take a nap before leaving the house and limiting your time in shopping malls (notorious for sensory bombardment), you will significantly decrease the chances of having to deal with a public toddler melt down.
If knowledge is power, consider yourself armed with this knowledge. You’ll be sure to have more empathy with your tiny terror next time he is spitting the dummy (literally and figuratively!) and you’ll relax knowing that soon he’ll be a Happy Little Vegemite again!
The Bigger Picture
So, if you’ve come to the end of a particularly rough day with your strong-willed toddler and you feel completely worn out and frazzled, keep the bigger picture in mind. Follow this advice from Jana Murphy (The Secret Lives of Toddlers) and go “tiptoeing in to watch her sleep for few minutes before you go off to bed. When they’re screaming, or throwing the dishes from the toy tea set, toddlers may seem powerful and miserable beyond their years; but when they’re sleeping, you can’t help but be reminded of how vulnerable, small, utterly beautiful, and needy they are.”
8 Life lessons to Learn from Your Toddler
Have you learnt anything cool from your toddler? We’d love to hear about it.
“You get two big windows of opportunity in your life to do stuff like build castles, step in puddles, watch Sesame Street, and just plain play: the first when you are a child, the second when you have one. Don’t get too busy or wrapped up in the grown-up stuff to miss it.” These words of wisdom are from Jana Murphy’s book, The Secret Lives of Toddlers. We’ve added six more ideas of fun things you can do to really connect with your precious little person and treasure the baby-bonding time you have with your toddler.
1. Pause. Connect. Play
One on one, focussed attention is a rare thing these days. We are so used to checking our phones for updates, news, social feeds. Even small kids are smart enough to realise when they don’t have your undivided attention. By disconnecting from our technology for a while, we can be 100% in the moment. We realise it’s difficult to switch off, but even a Nano second spent looking at your phone that just beeped, will send the signal to them that there is something (or someone) more important contending for your attention. Instead of checking Facebook, why not log into life, connect with your own littlies and start playing?
When last did you laugh right out loud? Play horsey or climb under the make shift tent with your toddler. Put your silly hat on and just forget that you’re the rule enforcer for a little while. There are so many battles to fight each day and rules to obey, your little one will love the fact that mum or dad can also be silly every now and then. Use funny names or words to encourage them to start talking, while also making everyone laugh. You can invent your own words that only family members will understand – It also strengthens the family bond if you have a secret word for something that nobody else uses.
3. Run Around the House
There are few things toddlers love more than hugs and cuddles. They love physical attention and the classics are always a safe bet; hide & seek, gentle wrestling, a good old game of chase followed by a thorough tickle and of course, dancing to upbeat music. This is where mum or dad can also get a good work out by lifting, swinging and piggy backing your little cowgirl. It’s a double whammy, you burn some kilojoules, and your toddler gets rid of excess energy. If the weather is good, take it outside and have a picnic afterwards.
4. Hit the Floor
If the weather’s not looking great, just take to the floor. Build a high tower with blocks or play Lego. You can start doing basic jigsaw puzzles and share in your toddler’s delight as they start getting better at fitting the pieces together. Sure, floor play is great for fine motor development, but the main thing, as with all these activities, is that it’s time spent with you.
5. Go Bake a Cake
Why wait until it’s someone’s birthday to do some baking with your toddler? Sure, it will be messy and no, your cake won’t look like something Insta-worthy (unless you #nailedit), but time in the kitchen can truly be time to treasure with your little one. The delicious smells of vanilla or cinnamon, the powder-like texture of flour and the sticky sweetness of caramel will be the ingredients of a sensory experience that will later bring back wonderful memories of happy times with you.
6. Reap the Rewards of Special Rituals
Small children love predictability. It makes them feel safe and content when they know what to expect next. So, use your existing bath or bed-time routines to create special rituals for them to look forward to. It might feel a little boring to you, but toddlers can listen to the same story every night without growing tired of it. The more animated your voice, the better. This is not just precious bonding time, but also how you create book lovers, good readers and children eager to learn later at school!
Many child care experts suggest you only have to spend around 10 minutes of quality, one on one time with your child, to fill his or her ‘love cup’ and prevent a variety of behavioural problems. Most of them also agree that children are mostly happy and content when they know that they’ve got your attention. That sounds like a worthwhile investment in peace and quiet (and your sanity!) So, take some time, treasure your toddler and remember, this precious time won’t last forever.
Finally! You get to take your little one home. This long awaited for day is charged with many emotions, which is totally normal. You may be happy to have your baby out of the hospital and simultaneously scared to have your baby at home. After all, caring for a premature baby is not an easy feat, but it can be done. Together with special insight from the Miracle Babies Foundation and the team at BabyLove, you will be basking in the love your precious new (and quite ahead of time) baby awakens within you.
Moving from hospital to home
Now that your little one is discharged from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) and at home with their family, you may need a few quick tips to make the transition a little smoother:
Nesting before the BIG day
After spending a considerable amount of time at the hospital, certain units have the option of staying the night in a private room, which is especially set aside so that you and your partner can spend some private quality time with your bub before you take him/her home. This will give you a glimpse of what it will be like to care for your baby at home. Essentially, this little dry-run serves to not only create a deeper bond between you and bub, but it also serves to boost your confidence.
Breastfeeding – a rich source to essential nutrients
Breastfeeding can be tricky in general, as not every baby latches on immediately to mum’s breast. That trickiness doubles when it comes to premature babies, as they tire easily and require up to 8 or 9 feeds a day. This means that parents have to watch out for their little one’s feeding cues and to respond to them whenever their baby displays them. A good feeding schedule is to feed your baby every 2 to 4 hours. Another useful point is to continue expressing your milk 2 to 3 times a day – this will maintain your milk supply. And in time, as your precious one grows, they will begin to suck more effectively at your breast.
*Challenge: Premmies sleep a lot; getting them to stay awake long enough might make a substantial feed more difficult.
Bathing Basics
With any newborn washing is not necessary every day, with a premmie, in particular, bath-time can be 3 – 4 times a week. The simple top-and-tail method, using a face cloth soaked in warm water to gently wipe your little one will be enough. Bathing should always take place in a warm room and have a towel nearby to wrap bub up in; so that they don’t get cold.
Dressing during the early days
Babies born before their due date are significantly smaller than full-term babies. This is where a customised wardrobe will be a beneficial addition to your little fashionista’s development. It’s true their smaller bodies make finding clothes for them seemingly difficult. However, there are several online shops which provide quality clothing with your baby in mind. Dress them in clothes which are gentle against their skin, comfortable and easy to get on as well as off.
Learn Basic First Aid
Most CPR talks to parents in a hospital setting are not accredited, which is why parents are advised to do the St John’s Ambulance course, Caring for Kids. Basic first aid is a valuable skill to have and acts as good preparation for any potential serious events. If your little one has breathing difficulties and needs an oxygen machine or an apnoea monitor it is a good idea to become better acquainted with that particular medical equipment. So if you hear any alarming sounds or see something that does not look right you will be able to help yourself and essentially your baby.
Avoiding Infections
The risk of developing serious illness is increased when it comes to premmies, as their immune systems are not strong enough to fight off all germs. A premature baby’s first form of defence is their mum’s breastmilk. Packed with antibodies, breastmilk is an excellent way for bub to strengthen their immune system. Another good way to avoid infections is to stop anyone with a cold or the flu from being near your baby. And following basic hygiene practices such as washing your hands on a regular basis is a good point of action to take for anyone who touches your little one.
These tips should better prepare you, as well as your family, for your baby’s return home. Although, if it ever becomes just a little too much for you, do not hesitate to reach out to Miracles Babies Foundation for support.
It is Australia’s leading organisation supporting premature and sick newborns, their families and the hospitals that care for them. Their primary goal is to support and help families and their newborns at every stage of their journey to achieve better, healthier outcomes.
Miracle Babies work in partnership with healthcare professionals, advocacy for families, creating meaningful communities that empower families and children to reach their potential and to drive innovation and quality towards better outcomes.
And just in case you’re still feeling a bit anxious, trust that your baby is going home because it’s time for the next part of your journey. So believe in yourself, and remember normal is a relative term; which is great because you’re discovering what is normal for your family.
Breastfeeding your Premmie
Having an in-built resource of highly nutritious and recommended food for your baby is one of biology’s many perks. Having that perk become a successful one is an entire different factor within the realm of motherhood, especially when your baby is born prematurely. But don’t worry because BabyLove together with the Miracle Babies Foundation are honoured to guide you through this special occasion in your premature baby’s life.
And there is nothing quite as special as bonding with your baby while you’re feeding them, whether it’s through breastfeeding, tube-feeding or bottle-feeding, your milk is vitally important to your premature baby. Speak to your nurse as early as possible about assistance with expressing your breastmilk so your baby can receive your breastmilk even if it is too early to breastfeed.
The Benefits of Breastfeeding
Breastmilk has a major advantage over formula. It contains antibodies that will protect your baby against infections which their immune system cannot fight off. This is especially important for your premmie’s growth.
Benefit 1: Your milk adapts to your baby’s premature status. This means that the colostrum that you produce will be richer in proteins than that of a mum who carried her baby to full-term. Your breastmilk will contain more fat and less lactose, as premmies have difficulty in digesting lactose.
Benefit 2: Babies who are breastfed have a decreased risk of respiratory infections, asthma, inflammatory bowel disease, gastroenteritis, childhood leukaemia and lymphoma to name a few.
Benefit 3: It could also improve your baby’s cognitive development, mum-bub attachment and reduce your baby’s chances of being readmitted into hospital. It also has shown to improve the neurodevelopmental results within premmies.
Benefit 4: Mums who breastfeed have a reduced occurrence of anaemia, a prolonged return of menstruation and a lower incidence of pregnancy. They also have a reduced occurrence of Type 2 diabetes, which is good news particularly for women who suffered from gestational diabetes.
Benefit 5: Breastfeeding has been shown to reduce the risk of SIDS. This is specifically beneficial to premature babies, who have a higher chance of cot death.
Benefit 6: Breastfeeding is also quite special, as it is something only you can provide your baby. Remember to keep pumping every 2 to 3 hours to keep up your milk supply.
It is true that breastmilk is the better choice for your baby; however breastfeeding may not always be possible. This is where pre-term formula comes in. This formula is specially developed to fulfil your premature baby’s specific needs. Premmies require formula that contains higher levels of iron, fat, protein, calcium, phosphorous, magnesium and several other vitamins. These special formulas will help your baby grow faster. Your team of healthcare professionals will recommend the most appropriate one for your baby.
Whether you choose to feed your baby breastmilk, formula or a combination of the two, ultimately you are doing more than nourishing your baby’s body. You are also nourishing your baby’s spirit (feeding creates an intimate bonding moment), which is certainly essential for a premature baby. Your little fighter has the greatest gift of all – you. So go easy on yourself and remember to nourish yourself as well; a healthy mum and dad are champion cheerleaders for any premmie.
Struggling to find a name for your baby? Here is a Baby Name Generator.
Dear Less-Than Perfect Mums
We don’t know how you do it. Sure we can imagine, but we would rather offer you support – a shoulder to lean or cry on. Yes, everyone has said how beautiful motherhood will be, but it’s also quite overwhelming. Especially, when “everyone” continues to provide their advice: from the correct way to hold your baby to when you should introduce solids into their diet. Funnily enough, almost all suggestions are accompanied by a horror story of some awful sort. No amount of google searching on ‘How to be a great mother’ will fully prepare you for how you will feel when someone freely offers their ‘helpful’ advice. Sure, it may be well-meaning, but no mum wants to be told what’s best for her child, certainly not while she is discovering this the most tried and tested way: by being a mother one day at a time.
Social media plays a big role in our lives today, and logging onto Facebook to upload the latest pic of your little one and share their cuteness with your friends and family can be exciting; and it’s certainly normal. However; not so much when that excitement is cut short by an annoyingly perfect picture of an acquaintance with her 1-week old baby. How does she do it? Does she have a private team of beauty experts at her beck and call? Stop. Wipe that baby puke off yourself and take a deep breath. Why are you even making a comparison? Your messy bun and mum jeans are just fine. Really. This is your version of motherhood, and that means you can be whatever you want to be because quite frankly, motherhood is not a ‘one size fits all’ pair of leggings. It’s about finding what works best for you and your baby, and being proud of that, messy hair and all.
So don’t let the heavily filtered Instagram shots of celeb parents or the neighbour next door undermine how you feel about yourself. You brought a human into the world and that is an incredible achievement. How you intend to raise that tiny human is entirely up to you and your partner. And, if you don’t have a partner to help you navigate and celebrate in your baby’s development, then all the more power to you. Motherhood is not a picnic or a Pinterest party, it has highs and lows, and all those indescribable moments in between. Most importantly, it’s what you choose to make of it.
Give yourself a break; forget the dishes and focus on the journey. Cutting yourself some slack is a definite must-do. Everyone deserves some TLC, most especially mums!
With Love,
The BabyLove Team
Before bub, your home looked like an oasis. After bub, your home looks like an obstacle course of potential trouble. The solution lies in one word: Baby-Proof.
Follow These 10 Tips to Baby-Proof Your House:
With baby-proofing being complete, it’s time to breathe a sigh of relief. After all, you didn’t resort to covering your entire house in bubble wrap and you discovered that it really is achievable to baby-proof your home without it looking like a well-secured fort.
Struggling to find a name for your baby? Here is a Baby Name Generator.
Midway to bub’s first birthday!
Life with a 6 month’ old baby is all about new discoveries, your once-upon-a-time-newborn is now growing so quickly right before your eyes. One blink and you’ve missed their graduation – just kidding! Though, sometimes it probably feels that way. For now, you’re halfway to one! Well, bub is, but so are you.
There is something quite special about witnessing your little one’s development and how they discover the world and what is in it – namely mum and dad. You’ve probably noticed some small separation anxiety issue. You know the kind, where they don’t want to be held by anyone else, except you or dad. This phase is kind of nice, but can also be a little bit worrying for some parents. We know, what mum doesn’t want to be her child’s first choice? What mum wouldn’t secretly have a chuckle when her little one prefers to be in her arms rather than being held by anyone else? If you are a little concerned though, don’t worry, this stranger anxiety is quite normal for babies at this point in their progress and will come to an end. Friendly interaction with other mums, bubs, friends and relatives will see it passing in no time.
Your little one needs plenty of stimulation to encourage their development. A simple way to begin is to talk to them as often as possible. Communication is the cornerstone to any relationship, including the one you have with your new bundle of joy! Talking regularly to your baby will increase their language development. You’ll also notice them try to mimic the sounds they hear. All those cute babbling noises are attempts at singing along to your nursery rhymes or simply to say “Hey mum, I love what you did with your hair.” Studies have shown that children learn at a much faster rate, in the first 6 years of their life. Making these early years, prime ground to encourage a love of reading and to stimulate their speech development.
Babies love when you make animal noises. Moo-ing and woof-ing are pretty standard sounds that we associate with animals and make our little one giggle throughout the day. But did you know there is another reason beyond laughter and fun for these? Animal sounds encourage children’s first words and are generally easy for them to make in return. A good way to complement this fun is by showing them pictures of the animals. They will learn to associate each animal with its distinctive sound. Playing and stacking blocks or playing with shapes will encourage their hand-to-eye coordination.
Lastly, that smile may have sprouted a few pearly white teeth, making for an interesting experience during breastfeeding… If you and bub are ready to start the weaning process, now is a good time to introduce solids. Ironically, it looks pretty much like the opposite of anything solid. Baby food: a mushy mess of nutritious goo!
Just think, in another 6 months, you’ll be planning your little one’s first birthday party! So enjoy all these fun, milestones with your growing baby!
Postpartum recovery
No. | Uterus Recovery | Perineal Recovery | C-Section Recovery |
1. |
|
|
|
2. | Pain
|
Pain
|
Cut
|
3. | Contractions
|
||
4. | Lochia
Seek Immediate Attention if!
|
Urinating
|
Staples
|
5. | Menstruation
|
Stitches
|
Note:
Postpartum recovery in general is unique and different for each individual. Do not over-work yourself as it might cause injury that will further delay your recovery. Take slow steps and gradually increase your activities or exercise routine to a level that you are comfortable with. What’s important is to stay healthy and fit at all times. Start by taking your baby for a walk, it gives time for you to bond with your baby while building up your stamina. Exercising is important to:
Remember to book your 6-week check up with your doctor.
Know when you are in labour
No. | Signs and Symptoms That You Are Close to Labour | Actual Labour | False Labour |
1. | Lightening
|
Contractions
|
Lightenings
|
2. | Increased Braxton-Hicks Contractions Irregular contractions – strong but not painful. |
Pain
|
Pain |
3. | Increased Vaginal Discharges Creamy white discharge that begins in the middle part of pregnancy. |
Bloody Show Release of blood streaked mucus plug. |
|
4. | Weight Loss 1-1.5kg weight loss due to shift of body fluids. |
Rupture of foetal membrane Gushing or trickling of amniotic fluid. |
|
5. | Decreased Baby’s Activity Baby will move less to conserve energy for delivery. |
||
6. | Nesting Instinct Burst of energy as you prepare for baby’s arrival. |
||
7. | Lingering back pain |
Seek medical attention if the following symptoms occur
1. | You are bleeding vaginally. |
2. | Your water broke – Fluid is green, brown, yellow or anything besides clear or pinkish. |
3. | Baby IS NOT moving. |
4. | You feel something is wrong. |
5. | You can’t stop vomiting. |
6. | Experiencing unbearable abdominal pain. |
7. | Have the urge to push. |
8. | Sudden onset of:
|
Struggling to find a name for your baby? Here is a Baby Name Generator.
Understanding your labour signs
No. | Questions | Signs / Indications |
1. | When does the blood stained mucous discharge start appearing? | This blood spotting / discharge appears when you have reached 36 weeks of pregnancy, indicating that your baby’s arrival is near. |
2. | Why is it sticky and looks like mucus? |
|
3. | Is the sign similar for all mothers-to-be? | The sign will vary from one individual to another, but in general the mucus will appear to be:
|
4. | Are there any signs that I should be worried about? | When there is a show of huge chunks of blood clots or lots of blood discharge – DO NOT be alarmed but seek medical attention immediately! |
5. | If the signs appear before I am 36 weeks into pregnancy, what should I do? | Consult your doctor immediately as you may be experiencing early signs of premature labour. |
6. | When the signs appear does it mean I am in labour and need to rush to the hospital? | The time span between show and labour is different for each individual, it could be:
Consult with your doctor who will be able to determine whether you have entered into active labour. |
Struggling to find a name for your baby? Here is a Baby Name Generator.
Let’s take a closer look at the process of childbirth.
Stages of Labour | Condition | Labour Experience | General Hospital Procedures |
1st Stage |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
2nd Stage |
|
|
|
3rd Stage |
|
|
|
Medical procedures that are available during childbirth.
This information will give you a better understanding on whatever procedure you or your doctor might choose for childbirth:
No. | Medical Procedures | Pain Relief Procedures |
1. | Induction with Oxytocin
|
Intravenous (I.V) Medication
|
2. | Episiotomy
|
Local Anaesthesia
|
3. | Vacuum Extraction
|
Epidural Anaesthesia
|
4. | Forceps Extraction
|
|
5. | Cervical Ripening Agents
|
Caesarean Section or better known as C-Section.
Apart from the Medical and Pain Relief Procedures mentioned above, one of the major procedures performed during childbirth is the Caesarean Section or better known as C- Section. C-Section should be considered as the last option and should be performed only during complications:
C-Section involves 2 types of incisions:
No. | Conditions that require C-Section (opt) | Conditions that require an Emergency C-Section |
1. | Placenta Previa Placenta partially or completely covers the cervical opening to birth canal. |
Prolapsed Cord A condition where the umbilical cord drops into the vagina during labour before baby is delivered. |
2. | Breech Birth Baby is positioned in reversed position (buttocks or feet first). |
Abruption Placentae The placenta partially or completely tears away from the uterus before birth. |
3. | Multiple Pregnancies Delivering twins or usually performed for delivering three or more babies. |
Cephalopelvic Disproportion Baby is either too large or is not aligned properly to the birth canal. |
4. | Maternal Illness Complications such as heart disease or diabetes. |
Foetal Distress Abnormally persistent foetal heart rate during labour that is life threatening to the baby. |
5. | Preeclampsia and Eclampsia (toxaemia of pregnancy) Symptoms such as severe high blood pressure, protein in the urine and seizures. |
Preeclampsia and Eclampsia (toxaemia of pregnancy) Symptoms such as severe high blood pressure, protein in the urine and seizures. |
Struggling to find a name for your baby? Here is a Baby Name Generator.
Be the first to know about competitions, new products, and specials!